Is the First Year of Marriage Really the Hardest?
Every newlywed has been forewarned of the difficulties during the first year of marriage. From your parents to your in-laws, everybody seems to be giving you advice on how to avoid arguments to managing your finances.
During the big day, a few guests even asked if you still wanted to go through with this. You can’t help but be a little worried and decide to prove everyone wrong. It can’t be that difficult, right? With love, anything is possible.
After the honeymoon, every couple must face the harsh reality that they are bound to each other until death do us part. Undoubtedly, problems are bound to arise and arguments will occur. Couples get on each other’s nerves and with today’s divorce rates, it is important to make sure the first year of marriage isn’t your last.
Deciding how difficult your first year of marriage will be is as unpredictable as the weather. Couples should determine from the get go that happiness starts with the individual. A marriage is reflective of the couple and how they feel about themselves.
If one person is not happy, this will certainly show in the marriage. You may want to take out your frustration and anger on your spouse, but this will only cause more problems in your marriage. Reconsider your actions and think before you speak.
It is extremely difficult to constantly consider someone else’s feelings, but by practicing you will get better at it. Emotional support is one of the benefits of being married and it is important to start getting used to always having someone around.
Having a successful marriage can be reliant on a sturdy foundation.
The first year of marriage will help develop this foundation for the long road ahead. Sometimes being able to laugh at the little things will help alleviate some stress and remind you both of why you got married in the first place. Having a sense of humor will help reaffirm your relationship with your partner by enjoying each other’s company. It also will help create lasting memories and teach you not to take life so seriously.
Sometimes the key to smoothing over an argument in the early years is to come to a mutual agreement. Take turns venting, or complaining and agree to give each other space when it is needed. Let your husband blow off some steam after a hard day of the office and be there for him as his wife. Let your wife go on a shopping excursion after an argument with her mother.
Deciding to understand and to listen from the beginning is a great way to avoid future arguments. Making an agreement will also reassure both individuals that they have been heard and their feelings were taken into consideration.
Communicating is probably the most important thing in a relationship. Developing this skill will bring you closer to your spouse and will enrich your lives. Tell each other “I love you” at least once a day is a great habit of getting into you, or saying “Goodnight.” Sometimes it is the little things that count during the first year of marriage.
The best way to keep the first year running smoothly is to allow yourselves time to celebrate every once in awhile. Although you may be poor, or working long hours, a night out on the town is the best way of keeping your love alive. Celebrate your first date, or your first kiss by giving a card, or just by making a romantic dinner.